What a Pleasant Surprise!

To everyone who cares to continue following me:

Tue, 26 Jun 2012 10:31:09 -0400

I will be picking things up over at my personal blog. Please feel free to see things over there!

Unbelievably Overwhelmed Part 529357

Mon, 25 Jun 2012 13:05:45 -0400

So, I know that nobody actually reads any of my text posts but I need to splurge.

Troy lost his job, got a new job in the meantime which isn’t making much money and we still don’t have health care. I’ve been trying to navigate the inner workings of the government websites, trying to get us signed up for Medicaid after Bryn was approved for Healthy Kids. All the while, we’ve been trying to deal with the fact that we can’t afford to live in this apartment anymore. So, we have two options (well, three but the third will never work), move in with my mom or move in with my in-laws. My mom would take us with open arms but she lives at least 30 minutes from where Troy’s new job is and she smokes in her house. I know she’d stop if the baby was there, but I can’t help thinking how bad it is that the house will be like radiating cigarette nonsense. On the other hand, Troy’s parents are reluctantly taking us in. They live closer to Troy’s job but are putting caveats on us, on top of all the times they have hurt my feelings. I feel like I’m between a rock and a hard place.

Pregnancy and labor were hard on me, as they are on everyone. I had to leave my well-paid job to focus on a degree that I could care less about and to take care of my baby and my husband was forced out of a job that was perfect and we had everything figured out and then BAM, no more job for no good reason.

Now all the hospital bills are coming in. I’ve been setting payment plans up left and right, trying to take care of this nonsense before my insurance is up in a week. I feel like my head is underwater.

I just want to take a deep breath and relax and I feel like I can’t.

Pacis, dummys and binkys OH MY!

Thu, 21 Jun 2012 17:39:10 -0400

Sometimes I wish Bryn would just take a pacifier. Like today, when she keeps waking herself up and the only way I can calm her down is by sticking a tit in her mouth. It’s been like this for hours.

When I finally get her to stop crying when it’s in her mouth (the pacifier, that is), she just doesn’t know what to do with it. She doesn’t suck at all, she does that thing babies do with food. Where she pushes it out with her tongue…

I had big plans for today to get ALL this housework done but now she is sooooo overtired she cant sleep without help. I’ve got her in the moby wrap until further notice.

OH BOY.

Just found out

Wed, 20 Jun 2012 12:54:28 -0400

There is a new bakery near my house called the “Pinwheel Bakery” and it’s just down the street from Troy’s new job.

THEY HAVE ALFAJORES. NOBODY HAS THOSE.

Seriously, every pound I have lost will now be regained. In the matter of days, I’m sure. The sheer amount of delicious baked goods in the window is just ridiculous.

So I bought a ring sling. It was like $60. I’m trying to decide if I like it or not. I am...

Wed, 20 Jun 2012 09:46:42 -0400

So I bought a ring sling. It was like $60. I’m trying to decide if I like it or not. I am still on the fence.

Always smiles in the morning!

Wed, 20 Jun 2012 09:45:14 -0400

Always smiles in the morning!

Wait for it, wait for it….

Wed, 20 Jun 2012 09:44:24 -0400

Wait for it, wait for it….

So hard trying to catch a smile!

Tue, 19 Jun 2012 13:15:24 -0400

So hard trying to catch a smile!

Things that happened to me today:

Mon, 18 Jun 2012 18:43:29 -0400

Watched a man get out of his car to get a tall boy out of his trunk at a stop light, in front of all the cars, at 2 PM.

Watched a student in my class run his hand down his crotch.

What is with people today?

Samantha, Today is Fathers Day, the day to celebrate all of us stubble chinned sperm donors across the country. Since this is my first Fathers Day, I'm not really sure how to act, but it has caused me to spend some time reflecting upon my new role. To sum things up so far, it has been amazing. Bryn is everything I have ever hoped for, and you really truely are an amazing mother. Every time our beautiful daughter smiles, I feel more validated than I ever have in my life. Thank you for everything.

Mon, 18 Jun 2012 18:30:57 -0400

Even though we are young and stupid and we got ourselves into this situation in the dumbest way possible, I think we are doing one hell of a job enjoying it. So what if people think I’m a weird granola mom and we have to move in with your parents because you lost your job. I’m happy that I have gotten the chance to be Bryn’s momma and I am so grateful to be sharing my life with you. She is already a huge daddy’s girl, on top of the fact that she is almost a spitting image and I know that you are going to be the best dad because you already are. The best husband, friend, lover, dad, confidant, snuggler a girl could ever want.

One day, we’ll get our daughter a home with a big yard for her and Ellie to run around in and a big window for Countach to lay in and a big bed for all of us to sleep in and a big kitchen for me to feed you all in and a big garage for you to drink beer and make silly things in. Until then, I am going to keep reminding myself that I have everything I need: you, me and our beautiful baby.

Happy belated Father’s day, Troy! I can’t wait to...

Mon, 18 Jun 2012 10:53:02 -0400

Happy belated Father’s day, Troy! I can’t wait to see Bryn’s adorable buck teeth :-B

I’m the worst dairy free mom ever. I seriously gobbled down blueberry pancakes covered in...

Mon, 18 Jun 2012 10:13:38 -0400

I’m the worst dairy free mom ever.

I seriously gobbled down blueberry pancakes covered in butter like it was my job. I didn’t even realize what I had done until an hour after we left.

Husband WHY U NO REMIND ME

Sleepy baby

Sat, 16 Jun 2012 13:08:50 -0400

Sleepy baby

are you happy?

Sat, 16 Jun 2012 08:53:38 -0400

Happy is something that I’d like to answer yes to but I have so much stress and uncertainty swirling around me that it’s difficult to even think that I am. I am content and before all this nonsense, I would say yes that I am happy unquestioningly. Now, I am scared and unsure and that makes me a little depressed.

Photo

Sat, 16 Jun 2012 08:50:59 -0400

It’s my husband’s birthday. I didn’t get much if chance to shop for him because...

Sat, 16 Jun 2012 08:50:34 -0400

It’s my husband’s birthday. I didn’t get much if chance to shop for him because he was supposed to be at work all week and instead he got fired.

But he’s on a bike ride this morning, so I’m going to try and finish. I wanted to get him some records and then when I couldn’t find them, some CDs and then when I couldn’t find those, I downloaded the music on iTunes for him. He didn’t even look at it when I told him! Dick move.

If Bryn ever decides to stop eating and by eating, I mean soothing herself to sleep, I’ll get up and go.

I breastfed at the mall today. In front of strangers! In my moby wrap! It was awesome!

Thu, 14 Jun 2012 15:33:19 -0400

I breastfed at the mall today. In front of strangers! In my moby wrap! It was awesome!

I used to get help at night with the baby. I used to be more than just the food source for the...

Thu, 14 Jun 2012 10:14:15 -0400

I used to get help at night with the baby. I used to be more than just the food source for the crying baby.

I’m really feeling physically crazy from the lack of sleep and mentally insane from the stress.

I used to be a happy, healthy person. I need a break from this nonsense.

baby modeling

Wed, 13 Jun 2012 10:24:12 -0400

kingpercy:

has anyone tried this?

i know everybody thinks their baby is really cute, but seriously, my baby is really cute. i want to submit some pics of percy but i have no idea what the process is like or what to expect. if he got rejected, i would go down there.

i dunno. we have a friend who did some cereal commercials as a toddler and she has a pretty substantial nest egg. i would love that for the little man. any sort of competition makes me really uncomfortable though.

We have been talking about this too! Percy would be a great model!

He is seriously adorable. A shoe-in.

I feel bad for thinking about exploiting Bryn, but the money would go to her college fund.

I’m still bleeding and I’m a month out from my delivery. I need sex. Body, don’t...

Wed, 13 Jun 2012 07:47:34 -0400

I’m still bleeding and I’m a month out from my delivery. I need sex. Body, don’t you understand?